Saturday, January 7, 2012

WOW - been a while

I have tried to update this blog a hundred times.  I get almost all the way done and then something happens and everything deletes.  So I decided to try this again.
Almost 2 yrs ago I started this blog and since then a lot has happened.  I am no longer single :-)
I have not had an acute episode of pancreatitis in 18 months :-)
I have had gastritis and 2 stomach ulcers :-(
I still have one of the best jobs in my life.

So, the reason that I no longer have acute episodes of pancreatitis - since the first episode in 1995, it has been my gall bladder THE ENTIRE TIME!!  
I went back to The Mayo Clinic June of 2010.  They did a functional MRI.  This is where they inject certain drugs during the MRI and watch the different organs do their thing.  They were watching the liver, pancreas, and the gall bladder.  A few days later I received the results.  Liver is a little fatty, we knew this already.  The pancreas has some minor damage, but seems to be functioning normally in spite of that.  The gall bladder needs to be evicted.  There were 2 polyps on the outside, about 60+ stones in the bladder and 1 large one moving into the neck.  I was shocked.  I have had more HIDA scans over the last 15 years that I should glow in the dark, and they never showed any problem.  Same with ultrasounds and CT scans.
Came back to Orlando, called my GI doc to recommend a surgeon.  Called, made an appt for July 14th at 1330 for the consult.  I watched my diet, trying to not eat anything that would make that organ get really ugly.
Here comes July 13th.  On shift with my regular partner, Jeff.  We had just stopped to grab a quick snack (I don't recall what it was, but I can guarantee it was something I probably should not have eaten).  We were dispatched to an interfacility transfer and while we were on our way, I had the most excruciating pain, followed by projectile vomiting.  He got on the radio, advised dispatch that we were coming off of the call and he was taking me to the hospital.  Phone call from the crew chief and off we went to the hospital that the surgeon was affiliated with.  (I don't remember the drive, but I am pretty sure I heard a siren).  Jeff said that I was about 15 different shades of green and he really thought I was going to die right there in the truck.
Made it to the hospital, saw the ED doc, drugged me up really good.  One of the surgeons med students came in to talk to me.  Within 10 minutes I was admitted and scheduled for surgery the next day.  
The next day, at around noon my gall bladder was removed.  While I was in recovery, he came in to see how I was doing and proceeded to tell me that I was the first patient that he has ever had that had surgery before the consult.
I stayed overnight and the next day, my boyfriend came to see me and my friend Melissa came to see me with her 2 kids.  Big D and Little M.  While they were there, Little M took her first steps, with just about every nurse on the floor in the doorway watching.  And it's on video.
4 weeks of recoup time - and some emotional recovery time, and back to work I went and I haven't looked back.
I still have the diagnosis of chronic pancreatitis because of the damage that was done, but like I said before, I have not had an acute attack since I had my surgery.  It has been a glorious year and a half.
Now to work on furthering my education... well I no longer have a "death sentence", so maybe now I can really look forward to the future.
I am a medic, and the beast has been tamed!!

Monday, May 10, 2010

The real reason I despise Mother's Day

Now, don't take the title wrong.  For those that are mothers, my mother and SIL included, it is an awesome way to commemorate my inability to do anything meaningful or expected.  I tend to call my mother and on occasion, when I feel compelled to stop crying, will call SIL, and my cousins to wish them a Happy.

This year is just a little different.  My Beast is progressing; I am turning 40; and I am not in a committed relationship.  Just the turning 40 part makes me think twice (or more) about taking on the responsibility of raising a child alone.  The Beast (if you missed the first post is Chronic Pancreatitis) would make a pregnancy fatal for me and/ or the unborn child.  So I had made a decision early in the year to have my tubes tied.  Therapy was required because I do not have any children and the doctor wanted to make sure that I knew the ramifications of such a decision.  Plus, I didn't think I was handling the emotional part of it very well.  I would cry at the drop of a hat over the most mundane of things.  And don't even get me started on the medicaid momma's that are in their late teens and early 20's working on baby number 6 (insert vomiting noise here) - hey beats sounds from a shot gun ;-)

So 6 weeks of therapy, I had the surgery.  I also added a hydrotherm ablation for good measure.  1 full day of recovery and I felt like a million bucks.  I was able to stop the hormone therapy, and have since lost so much weight, my once skinny mom is jealous ( I have never been smaller than her and I am getting there).  Mentally and emotionally, I have been doing FANTASTIC.  I feel so much better in that respect (had a lot of female issues on top of everything else).  Just when I start feeling like I could conquer the world, the epigastric pain starts again... with a vengeance.  I try to self medicate, change my diet (clear liquids to borderline NPO) and nothing works.  I go to one of the local ED and get treated like a total drug seeker.  These are people that I see daily in my line of work.  Do you really think that I want to be there?  I mean honestly.  Do you think I like showing my weaknesses?  And if I was such a drug seeker, I have more than enough fantastic narcotics at home, but there are limits to what I am willing to take when I am home alone.

So a lecture about we aren't your primary doctors and you really need to get back to the clinic (3 month waiting list) you need to get into your team here in town and figure out a new treatment plan.  That was the plan, but can we get me to feeling better now?  (hello this is sunday afternoon, what do you want me to do?  Vomit anything and everything I try to consume and be in such pain that I have all I can do to get myself dressed?  umm ok.).  So finally so frustrated with their lack of concern and compassion (jaded urban hospitals are like that), after a 2nd failed IV attempt on my dehydrated veins, I demand my discharge papers.  I refuse to be subjected to clinical bias and not at least get me feeling better enough to function in life, if even for just a couple of days until I can get back to one of the doctors on my team.

Papers given, I storm out.  Not saying another word to anyone.  These are people that I deliver patients to and expect them to treat them with the utmost respect and compassion.  How can I do that in good conscience when they treat one of their own with contempt?

The next day I am on the phone all day.  Making all kinds of appts.  I have been on the same meds, at the same dosages for almost 19months.  I have the 1st appt with pain management.  Well, we are going to increase your duragesic one level.  If we have to increase one more than that, you will no longer be able to work on the road.  Great.  Just what I need to hear.  (new goal, get back down to previous dose - not likely to happen, but you never know).  5 days later, GI doc (who still chides me about my knee and his nuts during the upper GI).  He doesn't change the composition of the enzymes I take to digest my food, just increases the number of capsules I now take from 3 with every meal to 4-5 depending on what I am eating or drinking.  And then he says it - nerve block and electro-stimulator.  I believe it is called a cilliac block (if I am wrong, please let me know.)  Quick links to some pages with info...

http://www.surgery.usc.edu/divisions/tumor/pancreasdiseases/web%20pages/PANCREATITIS/what%20is%20chronic%20pancreatit.html

http://www.surgery.usc.edu/divisions/tumor/pancreasdiseases/web%20pages/general/pain%20management.html

So, now I am scheduled to go to the Mayo Clinic in Jacksonville the beginning of June to address these options and to truly figure out how far it has progressed since my last endoscopic ultrasound.  Which I am sure I will attend this visit alone, as usual.  I am still trying to figure out how I am going to drive back the 4 hours with bad news on my mind.  Didn't work too well last year the day after my birthday... ended up in GA.  Poor Patrick (best friend at work), couldn't come up and "rescue" me cuz he was at work... on a 48.  But the thought was there.  He talked me through the turn around and getting me back to St. Augustine where I didn't have to worry.

Amazing how one major aspect of my life intermingles with another.  And not always in a positive light.

So getting back to feeling fantastic and all that jazz.  Since that visit to the ED 2 weeks ago, I have made my phone calls; seen my local doctors; changed a majority of my meds.  I feel better, but definitely not like I did those 1st few days post-op.  Now, enter Mother's Day stage left.  I really was doing ok.  I was jovial, and laughing.  I put up a status on Facebook that said "To all of my women-type friends... I want to wish you all a Happy Mothers Day. Remember how fortunate you are to have such a precious gift. I love you all and I hope you have a great, relaxing day."  I had some great comments, but the one that was my downfall for the day; the one that caused me to cry for the better part of the day, came from a friend of mine who has seen me go through more pain from repeatedly negative pregnancy tests, and pain of her own as I have yet to see her children; Michelle. "Thank you, Shannon! Means a lot and I know it's a tough one for you! Hope your day is relaxing! xxoo"  That is it.  That is all she wrote.  And it was my undoing for the day. 

Then add in the numerous blogs from those that I follow about their own mothers (like AD's - tear jerker for sure) and Medic999. I had a very emotional day.

I know that I am not the only one.  Hell, just out of my friends, I can list about 10-20 people that are dealing with a similar issue as me.  To that I can only say that there is one major difference.  They are not alone.

On that note, I have a drs appt in 1 1/2 hours to suck more fluid off of my arthritic knee.  I have to get out of here.  I-4 traffic blows chunks.

Until later - scene safe, BSI

Sunday, May 9, 2010

So this is blogging... hmmmm

Finally decided to start a blog.  Always wanted to start one, but never really took the time to learn about it (still haven't).  So, any tips or hints or ideas will be greatly appreciated and accepted.  (HTML is a whole new concept for this non-computer brain)

So you may be wondering what this blog is going to be about.  1st - my job, aka my life, as a medic.  I will do my best to change things to protect the innocent, as well as the guilty.  If you think I have failed in that in any way, please police me and let me know.  I have a tendency to ramble and forget things due to #2.

2nd - In October 2008, I was diagnosed with Chronic Pancreatitis of unknown origin.  I have never been a drinker.  At least not a daily drinker.  Maybe twice a year, but never really liked the taste of it.  No one can tell me how or why I have been so blessed with this disease.  I am on more meds than most of my patients combined.  I have a (relatively) strict diet.  I have had so many tests and procedures done, that I have become resistant to most of the milder drugs used for anesthesia, which my one GI doc still (to this day) reminds me about.  Well, I told him what dose of the meds I had to have last time for the upper endoscopy, he chose to not listen and as a result my knee became quite personal with his nuts.  At least he is still my doctor. (sheesh)

I am still dealing with the fact that my life expectancy is shortened because of this.  But now I am dealing with the fact that apparently it is progressing faster than any doctor on the teams (yes teams) had thought it would.  I have to go back to The Mayo Clinic next month to find out how much it has progressed.

So the medic thing.  The best thing I ever did in my adult life.  For years I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life.  I had no formal education; never stayed in college; working for fast food and gas stations just wasn't cutting it for me.

Enter rollover motor vehicle crash on 5/7/1997.  Doc in the ED said the fact that I didn't have my seat belt on was probably a good thing - not that I condone it, but in some instances, not wearing it can save your life too.  3 stitches to the elbow, a distressed phone call to my parents and within a week I am living with my parents again. And working at Subway.

In walks a crew from the local volunteer ambulance company, and as you can see, the rest is history.  Met some of the most amazing people that have truly been mentors to me over the years.

I have been a medic in O-town for 8 years (with a 4 month break to see if the grass really was greener on the other side of the fence, only to find out it was over the drain field of the septic tank).  I love what I do and honestly cannot see myself doing anything else.  I will die doing what I love.

I have had the opportunity over the last 2 weeks to meet some of the most amazing people.  They have this crazy idea of making EMS better for everyone involved.  I will let them be the ones to explain it. 
The Happy Medic
Medic999 
Their crazy idea is called EMS2.0 and 
it is explained and tweaked via The Chronicles of EMS 


I hope to meet some more amazing people like Justin and Mark.  I know that I am on my way to seeing some really good things come to the career that I love.  As time goes on and I get to know people better, I am sure that you will see their names here too.  They have already seen mine on their blogs, and I would love nothing more than to see them here on mine.

That is my story (so far) and I am sticking to it.